Do you know why it’s a shock to parents to see how quickly kids grow up? Because the difference four and eight is much bigger than the difference between 84 and 88. Brains and bodies grow fast at first, like…
Blog Archives
What Goes In Must Come Out
What’s the weirdest thing you’ve eaten? There was a French man who ate an entire airplane over two years. Number Two chose a faster and more modest diet: plastic fork. At school, hankering for his mac and cheese to be…
I’m Waiting…
We all have to wait. There’s a spectrum of patience, from Indian bureaucracy at the top to Manhattan driver at the bottom. I can be patient when I know it’s truly out of my hands, and horribly impatient when it’s…
Parent/Normal Person: The Dividing Line
Parents aren’t normal people. Normal people can enjoy simple things. Parents worry and ruin EVERYTHING. Don’t believe me? Let’s go for a walk with Number Two, a calm three year-old boy. Well…calm for three. Oh look, a fountain in a…
Sometimes They Are Good
Here’s how parenting goes: there’s always a fire somewhere. Either it’s coals under tinder, ready to explode, or you’re throwing handfuls of water on a Viking pyre. Either way you feel you can never completely relax. And here’s the other…
Holiday Battle Rage!
Who thought it was a good idea to sequester children in a small house, set their constitutions alight with sweets, then have them rip into piles of presents like hyenas going after a water buffalo? Christmas is madness, a ready-made…
Dain-juh Zone!
Do you like to take risks? Does your idea of “fun” involve throwing your body around with expensive pieces of sports equipment strapped to you? When you see a ten-story carnival ride called “Death Plummet” made of rusty metal and…
Posted in Parenting Tagged with: carnival rides, child harbat, danger, number two, parenting, risk, risk aversion, swinging
Exploring
The longest distance between two points is the path taken by children. This is how boring I am as a parent: I don’t want to fall in the mud. I don’t want to sit on a tree covered with fire…
Posted in Parenting, San Diego, Travel Tagged with: CH, Derek Noakes, expeditions, exploring, kids, number two, parenting
Joke Time
Knock Knock. Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Banana. Banana WHO? Orange. ORANGE WHO? Orange you glad I didn’t say banana? Now that’s a horrible joke. These are the kinds of jokes you’d find in the back of Boy’s Life magazine,…
Posted in Parenting Tagged with: Boy's Life Magazine, jokes, knock knock jokes, laughing, number two, parenting
The Drought is Not Over
The drought is not over but we got our first measurable rain in over 6 months. Maybe I think the weather gods are stingy but over 2 days it only ever rained at night so we couldn’t sit inside and…
Posted in Parenting, San Diego Tagged with: drought, ducks, lake, number two, parenting, rain, southern california, weather
