Do you know why it’s a shock to parents to see how quickly kids grow up? Because the difference four and eight is much bigger than the difference between 84 and 88. Brains and bodies grow fast at first, like…
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The “Joy” of Plumbing
Sorry, it’s been a while since I rapped at ya. Ten internet points for anyone who can name that reference. Let’s talk about the giddy thrill of home plumbing projects! I’m going to spoil the fun right now by saying…
Posted in Home Improvement, Products Tagged with: faucets, home improvement, number two, plumbing, product fails
What Goes In Must Come Out
What’s the weirdest thing you’ve eaten? There was a French man who ate an entire airplane over two years. Number Two chose a faster and more modest diet: plastic fork. At school, hankering for his mac and cheese to be…
Wheels, Manes, and Beers
Let’s get down to brass tacks: I need to write more. The blog has been suffering from regular updates and I hope to change that by, drumroll please, lowering standards! No more need for coherent and well-organized blog posts. Nope.…
Hats
Sometimes for dinner you need a good hat. Though it’s considered bad manners to wear your hat inside or in the presence of ladyfolk, sometimes you have to make an exception if the hat is ceremonial–I’ve seen bishops wear their…
Doctor Boy
I’m trying to get dressed this morning and a small doctor came into my room and said he needed to check me. He lifted my shirt, pressed a stethoscope onto my belly button, listened for a moment, and then proclaimed…
The Smell of Paper
Library books smell different than the sterile drawing and printing paper we’re used to holding. Library paper is yellowed, soft like thin leather, the corners folded and creased, the letters becoming translucent from the absorption of eyes, the transmutation of…
Crows, Spiders, and Bears
Let’s start with the crow. I really, really wanted a moody picture of a crow eating trash on the sidewalk. I’d put it in black and white, scratch it up a bit, maybe even tilt the image. You know, real avant…
The Doctor is In
Sometimes there’s a break from the chasing and yelling and fighting over who gets the orange plate. On delightful occasions CH gets into Big Sister mode which includes extreme patience and a spine-chilling mimicry of the things my wife and…
It is Freezing!
Cold weather is gripping the nation, especially my hometown in Washington, DC where’s it’s a temperature that doesn’t sound like a temperature: eight. Up in the higher latitudes it’s approaching temperatures found in outer space beyond poor Pluto. It’s thirty…
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