Child Harbat and I have a running joke about Comic-Con, the gigantic pop culture convention currently taking over my hometown of San Diego. The joke runs like this:
Me: Hey kids! Are you ready to go to Comic-Con again this year?
CH: Oh, man, do we have to? I HATE Comic-Con!
Me: That’s good, because your crazy Uncle Gary set up something in his back yard that’s even more fun!
CH: What is it, what is it?
Me: It’s something really really REALLY fun!
CH: WHAT IS IT WHAT IS IT WHAT IS IT?!
Me: It’s…LACONTA-CON!
CH: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!
Me: [turning to invisible camera] What is Laconta-Con? It’s a cross-platform multimedia experience. It’s this year’s premier social media and entertainment collaboration.
Me: [as voice of young hip woman] Sometimes I just wanna be, you know, private. And Laconta-Con gets me, you know?
Me: [as voice of staid old man] Sometimes Laconta-Con is quiet.
Me: [as voice of group of little hyperactive kids] And sometimes Laconta-Con is LOUD!!
Me: [as voice of guy reading legal disclaimer at warp speed] Ask your parents if Laconta-Con is right for you. Not recommended for ages under 18 or over 19. Laconta-Con takes no responsibility for seizures, limb loss, blindness, St. Vitus’ Dance, ‘The Shivers’, or accidental or purposeful death.
Me: [as crazy uncle Gary] Come on, kids, it’s LACONTA-CON TIME!!!
CH: YAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!
You can see why CH loves this joke and my wife leaves the room. As much as I’d like to say CH went to Laconta-Con this year, instead she has to settle for boring old Comic-Con. She dressed up as a My Little Pony, which involved me cutting out costume accessories from glitter-backed rubber sheet and gluing plastic gems on it. Which is basically what the MLP toys are like except they off-gas more petrochemicals. Be assured there will be more Comic-Con pictures but here is a preview of CH as My Little Pony’s Princess Cadence. Now please be sure to add Laconta-Con to your calendars next year. Crazy Uncle Gary said it’s going to be off the charts.
Writer, architect, father, husband.